Courage to Love

I found a loss of words while in Cambodia. I meant to blog weekly, but the words, the words just did not come. I know – that is not like me. But I found it hard to express what I was seeing and doing. How do I sufficiently tell the story that was unfolding before my eyes? Words were at a loss. Tears flowed.

The slum area I visited numerous times with Rose was overwhelming, joyful, depressing, hopeful, all at the same time. These people who had nothing had everything. We in America have everything and yet have nothing. What have we lost?

More tears flowed.

In-between bouts of diarrhea, well, a full ten days of it actually, and selfishly thinking about the comforts of life in America, I was hit with a startling realization – Jesus was asking me, me, to have courage. No, it had nothing to do with creature comforts and solid bowel movements. It had to do with love. Utter and complete love. God’s love. And the courage it takes to actually express that, to live it, and to breathe it. Our partners in Cambodia live it out, and it truly is amazing.

John wrote it this way: 

 7 Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. 8 But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.

 9 God showed how much he loved us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him. 10 This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.

 11 Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other. 12 No one has ever seen God. But if we love each other, God lives in us, and his love is brought to full expression in us.

 13 And God has given us his Spirit as proof that we live in him and he in us. 14 Furthermore, we have seen with our own eyes and now testify that the Father sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. 15 All who confess that Jesus is the Son of God have God living in them, and they live in God. 16 We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love.

   God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. 17 And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.

 18 Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. 19 We love each other because he loved us first (1 John 4:7-19)

And more tears fell.

Why? Because in some ways, I don’t feel like I fully understand or completely know how to show God’s love. Oh, I love God, and I have sacrificed a lot to be in the mission field. But when my worldview collides with the reality of poverty, injustice, and despair, I sometimes wonder if what I do, if what we do, is enough. Are we really expressing the love of God in the best way possible? Are we casting out fear? Are we bringing hope to the poor and setting the captives free? That is what the love of Christ does. That is the beauty of the Gospel. We are vessels, transporting the message of God’s incredible love through our humanitarian work; through our project that help prevent human trafficking.

And I feel entirely incapable, insufficient, broken. 

But then, this is not about me. It is about God. And more tears flow. Why would God use me? Why does God use humanity?

I don’t understand the evil of human trafficking. It is pure evil. Innocent lives changed forever. Children separated from parents forever. Women enduring abuse after abuse and either finally leave, just to find themselves in the same impoverished life that they have always know, or stay, and with each passing day their soul dies more.

How do I have courage amidst such evil?

And more tears flow. It is not up to me. It is up to God. The courage is the courage to love. To be unselfish. To trust the Lord in all things. To be light to the darkness. To express love, God’s love, in the moments He has entrusted us with. Pray with me for that type of courage – for me and for you. Our God is in control.

Hungry

What drives us? I continue to linger on this question, which essentially is asking two things: what is it that we spend our time doing and why?

The deeper the quest the closer we get to our soul – either the beauty or the ugliness of it. Are we driven by the things of this world or by Christ?

I’m not here to judge you or me, but the question needs to be asked. Are we hungry for the Lord and drinking the water from His well? Or are we hungry for the ways of the world? A simple question, but one fraught with deep meaning and implications. Do we hunger and thirst for righteousness?

Jesus says that He is the bread of Life. Jesus says all who are thirsty will find drink. Jesus asks us to come to His well, and drink of His water. Those of us in Christ know that we are justified through Christ’s death and resurrection. But life still presents us with choices, and this journey is termed sanctification. It is the ongoing, the continuation, of the work of Christ within us. It is the continuing to walk to the well, hour after hour and day after day.

I’m reading a fascinating book right now called, “Captivating” by John and Stasi Eldridge. Essentially the book was written for the journey of women – for women to reclaim the beauty that God has created in them. The core issue is the spiritual health, the spiritual beauty.

I cannot help but correlate the woundedness women face in our culture, in all cultures, with the abhorrence of what occurs in human trafficking. A woman’s soul marred by ugliness and perversion. The wounds deep and lasting. Yet Christ offers healing. Consequences of actions remain, but healing of the soul can occur.

I contemplated on these themes as I rode in a bus from Phnom Penh to Poipet, watching the landscape and realizing the changes in it from only six months ago. Lands which now exhibit all different hues of brown, changed from the sea green of the rice patties I saw six months ago. It reminded me of change, and of beauty; of the seasons of change; of how God uses time to heal, to give re-birth.

This morning I woke up to my Philippino missionary friends singing songs to the Lord. This was followed by scripture reading, which was followed by prayer. An hour they devoted to this time, teaching their children in the ways of the Lord. I felt like I was in the actual house of the Lord. It was utterly beautiful.

And it reminded me of the quest. Are we hungry? Are we thirsty?

Clay Pots

Clay pots are fragile. There is a reason why scripture uses that imagery. The potter forms the clay…the clay is placed in a kiln…the clay is transformed…and the clay is also fragile. It can shatter. But it can also be put back together. Powerful imagery.

This past week I encountered the source of my deepest pain, my deepest brokenness: Lies and cover-ups; slander and false accusations – betrayal by another. Righteous Anger that has sometimes led me down a path of slinging stinging arrows. Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.” I have had that quote, scribbled on a piece of paper, on my dresser for the last five years. I have both succeeded greatly and failed miserably.

This past week, in that moment of remembering, I had a vision of humanity. I was filled with…pity; with deep sadness. Dreams shattered; betrayal and the continual assault and onslaught of different forms of abuse – poverty, oppression, injustice.

And I remembered my bitterness. Bitterness that I have not been able to fully shake. At times there was healing. At times I thought I was through the pain. But different things would keep me gnawing at it. Clawing at it. Re-opening the scab, causing blood to continue to flow. Portions of my clay pot breaking.

Until Saturday. Until I saw through the eyes of Christ - one more time - compassion for His people. All people. Even those that cause injustice, loss and deep pain. You see, humanity is one. Christ heals. Christ brought us the church. Christ reigns.

When I went to Cambodia for two weeks in August, injustice and pain hit me squarely in the face. There was a day that I saw a Caucasian man in his early 70’s with a prostitute in her early 20’s. I blogged about it the week I came home (Holiness and Forgiveness). It was sickening.

God’s sovereignty is a mystery. I don’t fully get it. I am not wise enough to think about how He orchestrates events in our life and creates good out of bad; heals brokenness; and gives us hope when there is none. I just know it happens.

Christ came for the least of these. This includes those that have caused me so much pain over the years. It includes me, who has caused others pain over the years. It includes the 70 year old man who paid for a prostitute in Cambodia. Listen with me…

Cambodia is a place where at times injustice seems to reign. Human trafficking is prevalent. People work for two dollars a day. Prostitutes can earn four dollars a day servicing multiple men. We work at prevention; we work at stopping trafficking from starting in the first place. We work through the power of Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit. We realize that change can only occur through Jesus; through His grace and transforming power, changing those clay pots that are shattered and healing them to be like new. While we work primarily to prevent trafficking from happening, and thus work either with people that have not encountered it or those that have survived it, we must not forget those that have caused it. Christ came for them too.

I read the following passage of scripture in my morning devotions on the last day I was in Cambodia. God’s creative and poetic movement in my own life, scribbled on papyrus paper so long ago, written in Biblical Greek…

1 Therefore, since through God’s mercy we have this ministry, we do not lose heart. 2 Rather, we have renounced secret and shameful ways; we do not use deception, nor do we distort the word of God. On the contrary, by setting forth the truth plainly we commend ourselves to everyone’s conscience in the sight of God. 3 And even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled to those who are perishing. 4 The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel that displays the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. 5 For what we preach is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, and ourselves as your servants for Jesus’ sake. 6 For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ.

7 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8 We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9 persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 10 We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. 11 For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. 12 So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you (2 Corinthians 4:1-12).

We are clay pots. We are hard pressed. We are persecuted. We are struck down and it is all for the glory of God. The power is God’s. The glory is God’s. And what more of a display of glory is there than to take a broken pot and put it back together, healing it, and making it whole again. We pray that for the people of Cambodia. We pray that for the trafficking survivors. We pray that for the traffickers. . . And we pray this for ourselves and for all our neighbors near and far.

We are one.

We Are One

Human Trafficking. Just the sound of those words makes me sick. How can someone treat another human being, created in the image of God, as a commodity? The realization that evil exists hits us square in the face.

Paul wrote it this way: “Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand" (Ephesians 6:10-13).

There are 27 million slaves in the world today. This is more than any other time in the history of humankind. We are called to take a stand, to fight for the marginalized. To fight for those that cannot fight for themselves. To fight evil.

There are consequences to our actions. Always. Forgiveness is a vertical relationship with our Creator, the Alpha and Omega, the I Am. Forgiveness of others – those that have wronged us or have done evil to others - is also a vertical relationship with the Lord. What remains is the consequence of those actions. That is a horizontal relationship that impacts the dynamics of our human relationships. Justice is a fight for both that horizontal relationship as well as the vertical relationship. God is a God of justice after all. God is love. You can’t have complete love without justice.

Sin corrupts us. It corrupts humanity. The Hebrew people understood this concept and had what is called a kinsman redeemer. This person acted as the keeper of justice for a family. If someone wronged the family in any way, it was up to the kinsman redeemer to create justice in that situation. The concept of shalom – peace – was understood as essential in their worldview. One could not have true peace without justice. They are intertwined. Meshed together. One.

We live in a world that is becoming smaller. Technology is an awesome and powerful thing that can either bring people together or tear people apart. Last night I video chatted with people in Cambodia on facebook. Pretty cool, huh?!

What all this continues to remind me of is this: “After this I looked, and there before me was a great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and before the Lamb. They were wearing white robes and were holding palm branches in their hands” Rev. 7:9. Listen with me…

We may be people of different races, ethnicities, religious affiliation, socio-economic backgrounds, but we are one. God created us all. We are one.

Trafficking is a huge issue. It is a huge injustice. And I would venture to say that this is and will be the greatest struggle against evil in my lifetime.

27 million slaves. All created in the image of God. We are one.

What are we doing about it?